


Wishes

by halimede310



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Mating, Mating Bites, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Romance, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-18
Packaged: 2019-04-24 10:55:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14354016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halimede310/pseuds/halimede310
Summary: Joonmyun says a silent wish every morning, and wishes the wolf he wakes up to is someone else.





	Wishes

Joonmyun’s eyes slowly flutter open, before they immediately shut again. As he does every morning, he makes a silent prayer.

He allows his eyes to re-open and turns to see Yixing, sleeping peacefully, and he sighs. He wishes, every morning, that the wolf he wakes up to every morning is someone else, a boy with round eyes and a smile that makes Joonmyun’s heart pound.

But he has Yixing, instead.

Zhang Yixing, who makes food too spicy for Joonmyun’s tastes.

Zhang Yixing who, despite having skillful hands when he heals his pack members, is clumsy and has already broken multiple items in Joonmyun’s cave.

Zhang Yixing, who reached his heat sooner than Kyungsoo, and was forced into becoming mates with Joonmyun since Joonmyun was the son of the pack leader.

Joonmyun’s been patient; he wouldn’t consider himself the best mate, but he doesn’t hit Yixing, he keeps Yixing fed, and he speaks cordially enough to him.

But of course, he doesn’t love him. It had made their mating painful; Yixing cried as he clutched Joonmyun that night, and Joonmyun couldn’t find it in himself to comfort the sobbing wolf. Yixing had begged for Joonmyun to kiss him and he instead, imagined Kyungsoo as he bit and created the mating mark in Yixing’s hip.

What makes everything worse and uncomfortable is that Yixing is definitely, inconceivably in love with him.

Joonmyun shifts restlessly when he thinks about that for the umpteenth time, and Yixing’s eyes flutter open.

“Morning,” Yixing yawns, rubbing his eye. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah. I’m going to go hunt with Jongin,” Joonmyun doesn’t look at him as he stretches. Yixing hesitates.

“I have some leftover meat from yesterday. Do you want-?”

“I’m fine. Thanks.”

He leaves the bedroom to wash up before Yixing can nag him more and misses the other wolf’s wistful glance.

* * *

 Yixing wishes he hadn’t been the first single wolf to reach his coming of age.

_It had surprised everyone in the pack, as Yixing wasn’t the oldest member, and hadn’t shown any signs of extreme hormone development._

_In fact, among all the omegas, it was agreed that Yixing was probably the most delicate, which was why he was the only wolf that didn’t hunt. When they were pups, Baekhyun had playfully nipped at Yixing’s ear and the young unicorn-lover was so surprised, he yipped, keeled over and tripped on a rock, promptly leading him to cry._

_Yixing spent all of his time thus holed up with the healers and easily became the best healer the pack had ever seen._

_One day, a young wolf had stumbled into his tent, bloodied and bruised, and passed out, and Yixing’s eyes widened when he saw that it was the son of the pack leader. He carefully nursed the teenager back to health, pouring all of his efforts into healing the handsome, weak youth._

_“You saved my life. Thank you.”_

_“…what are you doing here, Prince Joonmyun?” Yixing asked quietly. “What happened? Who did this to you?”_

_Joonmyun sighed. “Oh god, don’t call me ‘Prince’. Come on, we went through training together.”_

_“I- If you insist. Now what happened?”_

_Joonmyun winced as Yixing dabbed a stinging ointment on his quickly fading bruise. “I got into a fight. My stupid brother was bullying Kyungsoo.”_

_“Do Kyungsoo?” Yixing’s eyes widened. “I thought they were friends. What happened?”_

_“I don’t know. Jongin’s been really weird lately. He keeps yelling at me and Kyungsoo for no reason, and when I saw Kyungsoo cry, I… I don’t know, I just… wanted to protect him.”_

_Yixing looked up right then from bandaging Joonmyun’s knee, and gazed into a pair of gentle eyes._

Yixing thinks it might have been then that he fell in love with Joonmyun. Or maybe he was in love for a longer time, and then only realized it right then.

Of course, he was aware that those gentle eyes only gazed at Kyungsoo, but… Yixing wishes, with all his heart, that those gentle eyes would just see him someday.

It had been painful, later, to go into heat and mate with someone he loved so much, only for that wolf to whimper and groan another wolf’s name in his ears during the mating.

Yixing wishes he could hate Kyungsoo. He wishes Kyungsoo was a horrible, stupid wolf, but he can’t.

He can’t, and worse, he can’t even blame Joonmyun for loving the beautiful wolf more than him.

* * *

 “Morning, Yixing!”

Yixing smiles as he opens his front door. “Hey.”

Baekhyun and Kyungsoo come up holding baskets of thread. Kyungsoo holds up his own basket, grinning eagerly.

“Want to join us? We’re going to make baby clothes for Minseok-hyung and Jongdae’s first litter!”

Yixing’s eyes light up. “Yeah! That sounds fun!”

“Baekhyun!”

The three omegas turn to see Chanyeol panting as he runs up to them. Baekhyun giggles.

“Aw, you caught me…”

“Where were you?” the cross alpha huffs. “I woke up and you weren’t next to me.”

Yixing and Kyungsoo exchange amused grins as Baekhyun lightly smacks Chanyeol’s shoulder.

“Chanyeol, not in front of the others!” Baekhyun scolds, cheeks pink, but Chanyeol’s having none of it. He determinedly kisses Baekhyun square on the mouth briefly before grinning and changing to his wolf form. Baekhyun’s entire face is bright red now.

“Park Chanyeol!”

The alpha wolf tears off towards the denser part of the forest for his hunt, howling victoriously. Kyungsoo giggles and nudges Baekhyun.

“Aw, he can’t hunt until he gets his omega’s kiss, huh?”

“The stupid idiot,” Baekhyun mumbles, but can’t help a tiny grin. Yixing invites the two in and the three of them sit around Yixing’s table as they pull out different colored fabrics as they keep teasing Baekhyun.

“So, when’s the first pup coming for you guys?” Yixing winks and Baekhyun throws a ball of yarn at him.

“Oh please, you were mated before me. I bet you drove Prince Joonmyun crazy with your scent.”

Yixing smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes, and Kyungsoo shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

“H- Hey, that’s my friend you’re talking about,” the younger omega says hesitantly, and the unknowing Baekhyun scoffs.

“There’s no such thing as friendship between an alpha and an omega. Look at you, you used to be best friends with Jongin and Joonmyun, and now they’re off doing all their alpha things.”

Kyungsoo looks like he wants to die from guilt and Yixing quickly jumps in to save him.

“What do you guys think of this color for a onesie?”

“Oh, cute!” Baekhyun chirps and Kyungsoo smiles similarly to Yixing before quietly cutting some fabric.

* * *

 “Was Kyungsoo here today?”

Yixing freezes but makes sure his voice stays calm as he calls out from the kitchen. “Yes. He and Baekhyun came over earlier. Why?”

Joonmyun enters the kitchen, sniffing the air. “It smells like him. Why does he smell so strong?”

“I… I don’t know,” Yixing turns to grab an onion and begins to furiously chop it. The alpha frowns when he hears a sniff.

“If your eyes hurt, cut them in the sink, you don’t have to cry over onions.”

“Ow!” Yixing drops the knife and Joonmyun sighs in frustration.

“Look, now you’ve gone and hurt yourself, you silly wolf…” the alpha clicks his tongue as he goes to Yixing’s first-aid kit and pulls out some gauze. Yixing cleans the cut and pouts as he puts the gauze on.

Stupid clumsy fingers.

Still… it was worth it, to see Joonmyun care about him. Yixing smiles at his mate, but Joonmyun’s already leaving.

* * *

“You’re awfully quiet,” Joonmyun comments as they lay in bed together. Just because he loves another wolf doesn’t mean he can’t be cordial to his mate. Yixing stays quiet for a second, before turning to Joonmyun.

“How was hunting with Jongin today?” he tries to ask brightly. Joonmyun shrugs.

“Fine. He didn’t say much, just grumpy as usual.”

“…oh,” Yixing says quietly.

“How were things with Baekhyun and Kyungsoo today?”

Yixing doesn’t miss the way Joonmyun’s eyes flicker at him when he says Kyungsoo’s name. Yixing bites his lip.

“Fun.”

“…what’d you guys do?”

“W- We knitted things for Minseok-hyung’s litter. Baekhyun made baby booties and I made a onesie.”

“What did Kyungsoo make?”

“What does it matter?” Yixing asks irritably, and Joonmyun turns to him, eyebrow raised.

“I’m just ask-”

“You just want to talk about Kyungsoo, don’t you? Kyungsoo, Kyungsoo, _Kyungsoo!”_

Joonmyun immediately rolls out of the bed, eyes wide as he gazes at Yixing. The healer wolf similarly rolls out of their bed and glares at Joonmyun defiantly. The alpha’s at a loss of words. Zhang Yixing has never raised his voice at him before and has certainly never glared at him the way he’s scowling at him now.

“You want to know what Kyungsoo made?!” Yixing screams and Joonmyun jumps, unused to this crazy, shrieking wolf. “You want to know what Kyungsoo was wearing, what he was doing?! Should I tell you when he blinked and the exact time he sneezed?!”

“Yixing, _calm down-_ ”

“You’re so curious what he made, why don’t you go to his cave and ask him yourself?!”

“You think I don’t want to?!” the alpha roars at his mate and promptly shuts him up. “You think I want to be here with _you_?! Don’t you think I _want_ to be with him!?”

The brash, cold hard truth makes Yixing freeze and submit, as Joonmyun’s eyes begin to glow gold, the alpha blood raging through him. The omega regrets having the meltdown and meekly bows his head.

“J- Joonmyun, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lose my temper.”

Joonmyun struggles to contain his anger and takes a few deep breaths, before looking away and before he can stop himself, he asks the question he always wondered deep down.

“Why couldn’t Kyungsoo have his heat before you?”

Yixing tries not to show how hurt he is at that question, and takes his own deep breath.

“I… I’m going to go read,” he leaves Joonmyun, and after Yixing closes the door, he hears Joonmyun howl to release some of his rage. The omega swipes at his eyes, embarrassed.

_Idiot, idiot, **idiot** …_

* * *

Yixing pulls out his healing tomes and begins to sift through them as he sits on the pelt. He can usually distract himself with new knowledge and information, but tonight, Joonmyun’s gold eyes burn in his mind and he finds himself re-reading lines without even realizing it.

He sighs as he flicks to the next page… and pauses when he sees a chapter he remembers skipping a long time ago. He reads through the information and his eyes widen.

He quickly tears the page out of the tome and hesitates, before hiding it in his pocket.

* * *

 

Joonmyun awakes the next morning and keeps his eyes closed. After gathering his courage, he turns, but sees Yixing, surprisingly awake. The omega holds out a tray of breakfast, eyes downcast in submission.

Joonmyun sighs but accepts the breakfast tray; he’s not one to hold grudges. Yixing fidgets as Joonmyun just gazes at the plate and there’s an awkward silence between the two, but the omega takes the opportunity to just gaze at his mate.

Despite Joonmyun’s lack of feeling for him, he still feels his heart beat erratically just from looking at the mussy bed hair, the small mole on his upper lip, the sleepy eyes that keep blinking to get focus…

Yixing actually feels tears float to his eyes that this perfect, wonderful being is his… and at the same time, isn’t. He pushes the tears down and takes a deep breath. He has a mission.

“Um… Joonmyun… can… can I ask you a favor?” he asks timidly. Joonmyun takes a bite of sausage and grunts.

“W- We… We mated almost a year ago. In seven sunsets, it’s… it’ll have been a year exactly.”

Joonmyun looks up this time, curious as Yixing takes a deep breath and gathers his courage.

“On… On that day, can you come home early from the hunt? I have something to tell you-”

Joonmyun suddenly chokes and Yixing yelps before running to get him a bowl of water.

 _“Dammit, Yixing, stop spicing everything!_ ”

* * *

Kyungsoo is washing his clothes, when he hears a knock on the entrance to his cave. He frowns and pokes his head out.

“Yixing?”

“H- Hey, Kyungsoo,” Yixing tries to smile but shuffles nervously. “Can… Can I come in?”

“Of… Of course you can,” Kyungsoo lets Yixing enter and the two friends avoid gazes until Yixing looks up.

“I have… I have something to tell you.”

* * *

Joonmyun wonders what’s going on with the world. He wonders if maybe _he’s_ the weird one, but no. The past few days, Yixing has been grumpy and it’s been very weird for him. He’s used to sweet, shy Yixing, so cranky, upset Yixing is a rare phenomenon.

Still, Joonmyun kind of likes the change. It’s so weird, but he thinks it’s kind of cute that calm, gentle healer Zhang Yixing can smile so kindly at a young injured pup, but later pout at a broken syringe as if it’s the syringe’s fault for breaking.

They never bring up that night of the fight again, and Joonmyun grudgingly admits to himself that maybe he cares more about the stupid, clumsy omega more than he says aloud.

Yixing’s been making breakfast for him everyday and his cooking has definitely gotten a lot better (it’s not as good as Kyungsoo’s, but it’s edible).

Another weird one is his younger brother. Jongin, his (baby) brother has been so cross, snapping at anyone and anything that pisses him off, unlike a few years ago, when he would cling to Joonmyun and Kyungsoo, tagging along with his weak little voice bleating “Hyunggggggg!”

Yeah, he’s definitely not the weird one. And let’s not forget Kyungsoo. The younger wolf has been acting strange around everyone, and his scent has been becoming riper these days.

A loud whimper startles him out of his thoughts. He has a dead rabbit clenched in his jaws and thinks it might be that, but the rabbit is cold between his teeth, so it’s unlikely. He hears the whimper again and it takes a while, but it sinks in.

_That’s Kyungsoo’s voice…!_

He drops the rabbit and sniffs the air. Now that the smell of game is cleared from his senses, he can sense where Kyungsoo is and-

He freezes before pelting off into a full run back into the forest.

* * *

 

He finds Kyungsoo and curses. The air smells wonderful; _too_ wonderful. Kyungsoo is laying on the ground of a grassy field, whimpering and crying, thrashing around. A spilled basket of flowers lays next to him and Joonmyun’s alpha senses are going into overdrive. He changes to his human form and struggles to breathe.

_Take, take, **take…!**_

“Joonmyun!” Kyungsoo cries tearfully. “Joonmyun, help me, _please_!”

Joonmyun swallows heavily. It’s finally happened; Do Kyungsoo is in heat. And to make it even better (worse?), Joonmyun is the only alpha with him.

He struggles to hold back his alpha side from taking Do Kyungsoo; the poor omega is probably delirious right now, probably just fighting the urge to be one with Joonmyun, just-

Joonmyun doesn’t understand why he’s hesitating. His alpha side rages at him to give in to his feral instincts, to take all of Do Kyungsoo while he’s vulnerable and heat-ridden. He might not be able to mate with Kyungsoo, but he could at least help him get rid of that mind-numbing ache the heat brought on.

He could feel what it’s like to be mates with Do Kyungsoo.

So he reaches out… and then Yixing’s heartbroken face from before flashes in his mind and he retracts his hand. Kyungsoo wails when he sees it.

“P- Please…” Kyungsoo cries. “Make it stop! _Make it stop_! J- Jongin!”

Joonmyun’s eyes widen as he gapes at Kyungsoo still writhing on the ground, canting his hips into the air.

“Jongin!” Kyungsoo sobs. “ _Jongin-ah!_ ”

Joonmyun’s alpha instincts kick in and he immediately rolls and dodges as something streaks into the field, a streak of pure black that aims for the alpha. Joonmyun melds back into his wolf form, and gapes when he sees his younger brother, glaring fiercely at him.

Jongin lowly growls at him, his red eyes, his hunched form, and his fierce snarl all emitting the same message.

_Back off Hyung. This omega is mine._

Joonmyun’s taken aback, but accepts the challenge, and Jongin is almost a blur as he tears across the field. It’s only thanks to Joonmyun’s experience and agility training that he’s able to avoid Jongin’s attack, because with how crazed Jongin looks right now, Joonmyun doesn’t think he’d be able to actually beat his own, once-fragile little brother with pure strength.

“Jongin...” Kyungsoo moans as he continues to writhe on the ground, cheeks flushed as he watches the younger wolf he loves fighting his own brother. Joonmyun doesn’t miss the way Kyungsoo’s eyes, despite blown in desperation and heat, still carry tenderness as he lays his gaze upon Jongin.

It comes as a gut kick to Joonmyun; literally. Joonmyun’s so shocked at the new discovery, he doesn’t realize until too late that Jongin is forcing him to submit.

His alpha side, more than anything, forces him to get back up and fight Jongin, and the two alpha wolves, who once playfully rolled around and bit each other, actually engage in a battle of their real limits, jaws snapping and growling at each other.

Joonmyun knows, however, deep down, he isn’t fighting for Kyungsoo anymore; he’s just fighting to put Jongin in his place.

If he wins…

If he wins, would he really take Kyungsoo? Even though his beloved brother loves the younger wolf so much?

No, he cou-

Jongin takes the moment of distraction to pounce on Joonmyun and push him against the ground. The two meet eyes, and Joonmyun melds back to his human form to show resignation. Jongin looks surprised, but after snarling a few times, his gleaming red eyes fade back to his soft brown, and his wolf form shifts to his human body.

The brothers pant before Jongin’s eyes glow red again and he jumps off of Joonmyun to launch himself on Kyungsoo, who sobs in relief, frantically kissing the frenzied alpha wolf. Joonmyun doesn’t bother to get up as he hears Jongin whisk Kyungsoo away to a more secluded part of the forest and he just lays there, catching his breath, as he smells the scent of Kyungsoo’s heat abating.

Joonmyun’s mind is surprisingly blank. He doesn’t feel upset or sad; he simply feels like a chapter of his life has ended.

So all this time…

Jongin re-emerges from the forest, looking exhausted, but satiated.

“…Kyungsoo?”

“He’s asleep,” Jongin says quietly, before flopping next to his brother and the two of them gaze at the star-ridden sky. There’s a peaceful moment of silence between the two of them, until Joonmyun speaks up.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

“…about what?”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were in love with Kyungsoo?”

“…because you’re always afraid of change,” Jongin responds calmly, and Joonmyun shoots up indignantly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jongin slowly sits up as well, eyes meeting levelly with him.

“You’ve always hated change. Even after you mated with Yixing-hyung and wanted to protect him, you convinced yourself you were in love with Kyungsoo because the idea of loving someone else frightened you too much.”

“That’s not-”

“You’ve always been like this,” Jongin doesn’t sound upset, simply informative. “You’ve always clung to old notions because you hate change so much. And I do too. That’s why I was so angry all the time. I didn’t want to admit that I loved Do Kyungsoo.”

“…so what brought this on?”

“The idea that maybe he would love me back, even though I’m stupider and slower and weaker than you.”

“Jongin-!” Joonmyun says in shock. He was unaware that his brother had such a poor self-image, but Jongin just holds up a hand.

“Everyone’s always compared me to you, Hyung. So when I realized that you and I fell for the same omega, I really thought I was going to die. Do you know what it feels like, to think the one you love, loves someone more perfect than you?”

“I’ve never thought of myself as better than you,” Joonmyun says quietly. “I’m so sorry, Jongin-ah.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” Jongin looks down, arms resting on his bent knees. “I realize now it was all just me; the only one who thought you were actually better than me… was me. But it’s different now, because I have Do Kyungsoo, and I’m not letting him go.”

There’s silence, until Joonmyun looks down and chuckles. “When did you get so wise?”

“When I realized there’s no other omega for me,” Jongin leans back and looks up at the sky. “You loved Do Kyungsoo because he brings familiarity and consistency in your life. But I love him because everyday is something new with him and it makes my life exciting, just to see him smile.”

Joonmyun feels his heart pang. His little brother has really grown up. He stands up and brushes himself off, and Jongin stops him.

“Wait.”

“Hm?”

Jongin contemplates, before sighing. “There’s something you should know.”

* * *

Joonmyun barrels through the forest, heart pounding. He doesn’t remember running this quickly in his life, but his entire body, his senses have gone into frenzy.

He accidentally tramples a bush as he races through the dense foliage, but he could hardly care less.

_“While I was… taking care of Kyungsoo… he said something.”_

_“I don’t really want to hear this,” Joonmyun winces, but Jongin grabs his brother’s forearm._

_“He said… he wanted to have pups.”_

_“Okay, seriously, you-”_

_“He said he wanted to be pregnant… like Minseok-hyung and Yixing-hyung.”_

_“Seriously, I don’t…” Joonmyun’s words fade. “What…?”_

_“Hyung…” Jongin’s grasp on Joonmyun’s arm tightens ever so slightly. “Hyung, please… please give up on Kyungsoo.”_

_Joonmyun doesn’t respond, too dazed. He suddenly thinks back to Yixing’s erratic behavior and the grumpy pout he’s been seeing lately._

_“I have to…”_

_Like thunder, it suddenly slams into Joonmyun that today is the day that Yixing requested he come home early. He said he had to… tell him something…_

Joonmyun reaches the front of his cave and almost tears the entrance door straight off.

“ _Yixing!_ ” he screams into the dark room, but there’s no response. He runs into the kitchen… and his voice catches as he sees the table set for two and no Yixing. The candles on the table have muted to a glowing mess of embers; wherever Yixing is, he hasn’t been here in a while.

Joonmyun sniffs and runs out of the cave again. He can barely catch Yixing’s scent; how has the omega gotten away so far? He doesn’t give himself time to think and just runs, allowing his alpha side to take over so that he can find his mate with pure instinct.

* * *

Joonmyun’s been running for half an hour now, and Yixing’s scent is closer, but what drives him into frenzy is that it’s mingling with another wolf’s. He’s with another wolf, and he’s a little too close.

Joonmyun howls, and bursts into the clearing that’s ripe with Yixing’s scent. His eyes dilate when he sees his mate on the ground, bloodied and bruised. He races to him and whines, licking his mate’s wounds. Yixing slowly turns to him, smiling gently.

He’s dressed in a light silk robe of gold, tattered and torn, and Joonmyun’s heart hurts because Yixing is so beautiful, like some ethereal angel on the ground, fallen and beaten.

He almost cries when he sees the gaping wound on Yixing's chest, leaking blood and staining the omega's once flawless skin.

“Hi,” he lightly rubs Joonmyun’s ears and the wolf melds back to his human form, kneeling by Yixing’s prone form.

“Yixing…” Joonmyun struggles to hold back his alpha from emerging and ripping out the throat of the wolf that _dared_ to lay his hands on his omega. “Yixing, who did this to you?”

Yixing sighs and looks up at the sky. “It doesn’t matter. I was stupid and emotional... When you didn't show up, I decided to be dramatic and run away like an idiot. I’m an omega leaking my scent everywhere, and a rogue wolf… I guess a rogue wolf decided to…”

Yixing’s eyes fill with tears as he continues to touch Joonmyun. “It doesn’t matter anymore. He’s gone and he’s satisfied.”

Joonmyun's eyes burn gold when he realizes that the rogue wolf had taken his fill of Yixing's purity and then tried to discard of him after he was done.

Joonmyun wants to  _kill._

"Yixing…”” Joonmyun tries to not be angry. “That’s a very bad mindset to have for the mother of my pups.”

“…he told you, huh?” Yixing sniffles and runs his fingers down Joonmyun’s arms. “And I guess you two…”

Joonmyun realizes, in horror, that Kyungsoo’s scent, along with his heat, has clung to him and he shakes his head frantically.

“No, no, I didn’t-”

“It’s okay,” Yixing tries to smile. “I… I didn’t have any expectations.”

“I’m sorry,” Joonmyun says desperately. “I’m sorry I was late, but I was… I was fighting with Jongin.”

“For Kyungsoo, right?” Yixing smiles weakly. “It’s okay. Kyungsoo can be yours now.”

“What are you-?” Joonmyun asks sharply, but Yixing just hands him the page he tore out of his tome nights ago. Joonmyun stares at it, not quite understanding what he’s reading.

“It’s… It’s how to change mates,” Yixing tries not to sob and Joonmyun reads through it briefly, before his eyes widen and he drops the paper.

“Yixing, you didn’t-!” he scrabbles to pull Yixing’s clothes and the omega weakly protests, but Joonmyun tears a hole in the robe at Yixing’s hip, and stares at the bloodied mess where his mark once was. Yixing has physically mangled Joonmyun’s mating bite out of his own body, leaving only a bloodied scar.

“I’m sorry…” Yixing’s eyes fill with heavy tears and Joonmyun prepares to yell at him, but Yixing’s soft cries are so heartbroken, he pauses.

“…I’m sorry I wasn’t Kyungsoo…” Yixing weeps and the alpha freezes.

_How… How is it that even though I put you through so much pain, you only care about my happiness?_

**_Do you know what it feels like, to think the one you love, loves someone more perfect than you?_ **

Jongin’s voice rings in his mind, and he realizes right then, that he’s crying as well.

“Yixing… thank you,” Joonmyun sobs. “Thank you, but… but this isn’t what I want. I want… I want to stop pushing you away. I want you to be my mate. I… I didn’t do anything with Kyungsoo. I wouldn’t do that. I… I want to be with you. Yixing, please…”

“…Joonmyun… thank you…” Yixing smiles sadly before his eyes cloud over and his breathing grows raspy.

“No… No, don’t-!” And Joonmyun, for the first time ever, kisses his mate, tries to keep him with him, but Yixing’s body stills in his grasp.

* * *

The sun rises in the clearing, and Joonmyun slowly wakes up… and clamps his eyes shut.

He makes a silent wish… and then opens his eyes and turns to the side.

As usual, his wish doesn’t come true.

 


End file.
